How would companies advertise their products if they were to be totally honest?
You can check the answer of the people under the question at Quora “if coffee commercials were honest“
How would companies advertise their products if they were to be totally honest?
You can check the answer of the people under the question at Quora “if coffee commercials were honest“
Had world renowned companies been totally honest about their products,this would be their range of advertisements:
1.Lays:
The ratio of air to chips is too high and they should change their motto to:
More air for your buck!
2.FedEx:
Yes,most probably!!
3.Candy Crush Saga:
It’s damn bloody addictive.
4.MTv:
So that was what M stood for.
5.iTunes:
Now that’s something true.
Thank you!!!
MasterCard: You don’t know why you’re using us.
Listerine: We kill the germs plus some good bacteria.
Jockey: Pay us 200% for something you don’t get to show off because we are a brand.
Fedex: Because the Govt. owned postal services are slow.
Lufthansa: As you can’t afford Emirates.
Amazon: We know you are lazy to Walmart.
Google: Until you know about Duckduckgo.
Dominos: We are the cheapest Pizza huts.
Starbucks: Chuck coffee. Check Instagram.
Intel: Intel inside. Mental outside.
Samsung: We are the leaders in following brands.
Here is my try as most of the other answers have simply taken content from elsewhere. I love many of the companies here, but I will wear the consumerist hat 😉
McDonalds – Fast food now. Fast death later.
Facebook – Hate your friends in no time.
Twitter – Waste life 140 characters at a time.
Coca Cola – Destroying global health since 1886.
Pepsi – Same as Coke, but doesn’t even taste good.
RJ Reynolds – Cheapest way to cremate.
Apple – Be unique in buying the same stuff everyone owns.
Microsoft – Pay for products that others get for free.
Google – An advertising company that sticks billboards over “libraries”.
Landrover – Live your life in the repair shop.
Mercedez Benz – Over pay on your way
BMW – Exquisitively made for the snobs.
Bank of America – Lose an arm and leg paying the fees.
Goldman Sachs – Gamble with other people’s money
United Airlines – You will never reach on time.
AT&T – Pay for overpriced Internet if you can get a signal.
Comcast – You have no other option, baby!
1.Samsung: Have a blast.
2. Snapchat: Filtering your moments.
3. MRF: Do you think we need an ad when we have the best batsmen endorsing us?
4. Lays: Packaged air.
5. McDonalds: Good news! Now selling the same burger under a different country’s name!
6. Flipkart: Cheating Big. From the Billions.
7. Wikipedia: The first stop for all Jon Snows.
8. Red Bull: Overpriced caffeine.
9. Times of India: Good luck turning the pages of advertisements.
JIO
To be honest we have fastest 4g network in India which sometimes touch the speed of 0–1 kbps.
APPLE
Although our i phone approximate cost 15000 INR but we say think different.
Let sale it for 70000 INR.
Facebook
Literally we are here not for communicating the world, our aim is to spoil the life of youngsters.
TATA SKY.
(Isko lagaa daala toh life jingalala, par apki ni hmaari.)
In english
The company says that if you try this product, life will be amazing.
But wait there is a misunderstanding, what do you think your life gonna be awesome, no its not yours its our.
SAMSUNG
Yes, We know that our phones keep on hanging but its you who’s like to show off!
But its an warm request to all of you to buy our products otherwise we’re going to extinct like yahoo.
HIKE
Hey there is anyone who is screwed by using whatsapp.
If yes then Join us!
Washing powder “ghadi”
Companys tag line “phele istemaal kro fir vishwaas kre” and in english “First use then believe us”. And if you do not, its your fault we are not bear your losses.
Perhaps I may not get the idea to translate that tag line in english properly. But i had tried!
If someone could do it better. Go ahead!
TATA -nano
Sorry we’re experimenting something worthy but in conclusion we ended up with this.
As you know all cars are designed by man.
And “Man is a puppet of mistakes”.
We had done mistake and if you want to do so then go ahead for buying this.
Maggi – 2 minutes 14 seconds Noodles !
Lays : Flavored Oxygen Masks.
Apple : Innovate and hype about things that are already innovated.
Wikipedia : Your personal assignment assistant.
Axe : Ladies depicted in the advertisements are not guaranteed in real life.
Maggi : The ultimate college survival kit.
Sunfeast Yippee : When there’s no Maggi.
Starbucks : Coffee : Overpriced ; Selfies on facebook : Priceless
Samsung : KABOOM!
Cadbury Gems : Poor man’s M&M’s.
Coco-cola : Open calories (and diabetes)
Tinder : Creating few relationships, destroying many.
Hope this helps.
Patanjali – your Ayurveda daily stuff !
Coco cola – Want Diabetes , sugar !
Colgate – Your daily chemical paste.
Uber – costly rental car services.
Apple – Expensive repairs & charger burn fast .
Explorer – we will make your search complicated.
Chrome – Low downloading spped.
Lindin – Connect with peoples for no use.
Star max – Same films repeater
Nokia- Our new phone are Microsoft .
Google – We eill try to make you use only me.
Facebook – Meet fake girls profile !
McDonalds – costly & tasteless burger
Rolex – Watches for Snobs
Nirma powder – your daily washing powder for Machines .
Axe deordrants – Use us for rejections form girls.
Navratan oil – smell that make you sleep.
Mountain deo – Good for nothing .
Honest advertisement here its goes……
MAYBELLINE:- “ Maybe it’s Photoshop.”
2. WIKIPEDIA :- “You are welcome, college students.”
3. GILLETTE :- :We’re just going to keep adding more blades.”
4. HARLEY-DAVIDSON :- “Here for you during that midlife crisis.”
5. VICTORIA’S SECRET :- “Lowering a woman’s self-esteem since 1977.”
6. iCloud :- “Hacker-friendly storage for your personal data.”
7. MACBOOK :- “$2000 facebook machines.”
source:- google image
Peet’s
There is very fine line between being honest and pretending to be honest. Honesty sells when you have genuine product and think about your consumers first. Just bring out how genuinely you have made the product, for eg, my company manufactures Aloe vera gel. Most of the other gels you get in the market add an added synthetic colour which make sit look green. I didn’t want to do this, so this is what i have printed on the label
Added colour? Well, Pure Aloe vera gel is colourless and that’s exactly what’s inside.
So these honest quirky quotes will catch the attention of your product. Also check out the packing of Paperboat. They have every interesting way for marketing.
-Akshtoo
VIVO : Trusts in advertising more than services
OPPO: inspired by Vivo
ROLEX : Vends watches not time
GOLD FLAKE : Medical companies/hospitals should pay a part of income to us.
Thanks
1. Sharda University
2.Fair n Lovely
3. Livpure
4. Armani Emporio
5. Ray- Ban
6. Slice
Self made
Apple: Buy the phone you don’t need, with the money you don’t have
Samsung: Our phone is the bomb!
Coca-Cola: Taste the feeling, of diabetes.
Facebook: Come, weep at other people’s show of a good life.
TATA Starbucks: Status upgrade for cheap!
Maggi: Cerelac for adults!
Aquagaurd: Boond Boond kharcha!
Royal Enfield: Because you need something big between your legs.
Diary Milk: Our chocolates are alive!
Fair & Lovely: Turns your racism quotient from white to black in 5 minutes!
Snapdeal: Unbox the same thing!
Google: I know what you did last night.
Air India: Just like home, now clean the dishes!
Kingfisher: King of good times, Lord of bad times as well!
Raymond: Tired of completing you since 1925!
Twitter: Starting wars in less than 140 characters!
Instagram: Because, you click ugly photos.
Let’s consider it for my chosen set of companies:
Netflix: “Spend more time searching than actually watching.”
2. Urban Outfitters: “Pay money to look homeless.”
3. Wikipedia: “You’re welcome, college students.”
4. Sperry: “You probably haven’t even been on a boat.”
5. The Onion: Real news for dumb people.”
6. Lay’s: “Flavored Air.”
7. Instagram: “Mask bad photos with filters.”
8. YouTube: “Don’t read the comments.”
9. Crayola: “The white one is useless.”
Source: Top Trending
It’s funny how honest advertisements can help people come up with pranks that they could play on their near, dear and not-so-dear ones.
Ikea : “We throw in extra parts just to mess with you.”
Sharpie : “Instantly turns the passed out person into a canvas.”
Subway : “Let that bread smell soak into your clothes.”
Starbucks : “We serve you decaf if you’re rude.”
Gillette : “We’re just going to keep adding more blades.”
WedMD : “Convince yourself that you have a terminal illness.”
Activia : “Helps you poop.”
Source: SeeTheN
Dunkin’
It probably would go like this:
I am iphone 7, and the only reason I don’t have a headset jack is because I want to suck out your money and I am sorry to be too dumb to have a better idea.
While scrolling through my Instagram feed, I got to see this page ( The Fake Ad Co. ) which makes honest ads that are more interesting than the original ones.
1.YouTube :
2.Bitcoins :
3. Lays :
( You got it, right ? )
4. CEAT Tyres : Sakht Launda (Tough guy)
5. Olay :
6. Snapchat ( When Evan Spiegel was being mocked! ) :
7. Studds Helmet : ( Get rid off paying fine!)
8. Havells :
9 . Sarahah :
10. Whiteners : Perfect Gift For New Year!
11. Netflix :
12. Durex :
13. Wikipedia : ( Free encyclopedia!)
14. And finally , Quora :
(You’ll surely get an answer.)
Some of the brutally honest ads I’ve ever seen!
Ain’t they?
You could check more of them at The Fake Ad Co. (@thefakeadco) •
Snapchat – Animals are more lovable than humans!
Luxottica – The illusion of choice
McDonalds – Fast food towards fast death
Coca-Cola – Sugared Water
Apple – Give us all the margin
Microsoft – Experience the Blue screen of death
Samsung – Cheapest bomb to take on airlines
Maruti – Cheap plastic and cheap material
Honesty is a tricky idea, since it hinges heavily on subjective interpretation. Subjectivity does not amount to dishonesty, and there are relatively few examples of advertisements that contain objective falsehoods. Rather, advertisers tend to find ways of deceptively framing the truth so as to give their audiences favorable impressions of the advertised products and services.
There are some common advertising practices that I regard as dishonest to the point of being unethical, although they don’t amount to lying, exactly. These are just a few of them:
Photography
A lot of photography is manipulated or augmented in ways that produce unrealistic expectations of a product. Fast food photography is staged using food that’s been assembled with tweezers, syringes and glue so that it looks perfect. Cosmetic companies will advertise a single product with an image of a model who’s actually wearing eight different products. Other examples abound. Don’t get me started on fashion retouching and body image stuff.
Statistics
It’s pretty easy to present statistics in a way that seems to support just about any viewpoint, and people form impressions so quickly when they consume advertising that they generally don’t have the ability to investigate the credibility of sources, etc. Any restaurant can say they’ve been “voted best burger in town,” without specifying who conducted the poll or who the polled audience was. Charts and graphs can be presented in ways that are technically accurate but give a wildly skewed immediate impression.
Testimonials and Endorsements
Paid spokespeople can be scripted, coached and shot in ways that make them seem like unpaid people spontaneously praising a product. Celebrity endorsement is a version of this wherein, even though the audience is aware that there is remuneration involved, we tend to conclude that there must also be some legitimacy to the statement that David Beckham wears those underwear or George Clooney drinks that coffee.
Lifestyle Associations
Sometimes—not all the time, but sometimes—the lifestyles with which companies attempt to associate their products are largely antithetical to the actual lifestyles encouraged or produced by the products. Even though my new Seiko watch may not come with the yacht, the suit, or the woman, it still makes sense on some level to associate the product with other trappings of high luxury, so I don’t have a problem with that. I do have a problem, however, with Michelob trying to associate its beer with health and fitness, for example.
For the most part, advertising is honest insofar as it doesn’t present objectively false information. Rather, it tends to present an advertiser’s subjective message about its product. If by “totally honest,” you mean completely objective and free of embellishment, then advertising would be a stack of consumer surveys and market research delivered to your mailbox—basically what ad agencies start with when they design campaigns. Everything beyond that is subjective embellishment.
If Companies were honest !!
Samsung – Have a blast
Lays – Packaged air
McDonald’s – Same burgers with different country Names
Wikipedia – for you Jon snow
Times of India – Powered by Ads
Kinderjoy – you may not know us but your children do
Apple – yeh Kidneys hame dede
Snapchat- Shakal deke hai Yele Filter use karle
Beats – Celebrity k sath tho zarur deka hoga
KFC- your pocket licking Food
…….
Add in there :p
Apple – Your best photos will contain our logo. Also, you could get a better phone at half the price but our logo.
Amity University – Dhoni is our brand ambassador and our founder is a fraud. Learn everything.
Sharda University – World full of losers is here. Where are you?
Paytm – Freecharge ? Mobikwik ? Here’s 100 rupees cashback to uninstall those.
IIT – Not the alma mater of Sundar and Satya.
Fair and Lovely – You can be Miss India in 30 days. Lagi shart ?
Whatsapp – Do we even have to advertise ?
Royal Enfield – Laddakh trips are our copyright.
Google – Your internet browsing starts here.
Ola – Because Uber is not available. Also, we offer shuttles, bikes, cranes, space shuttles and inter galactic travel at only 6 rupees per km.
Lux – Deepika is crazy for our newest 28 rupee soap. We also manufacture chaddis.
Royal stag – Make it large because our small pegs cannot be swallowed.
Kingfisher – Not a king anymore. Also, good times are gone. We too had an airline.
Rahul Gandi – Mummy, mai nii banna PM.
Patanjali – Baba is not a name, Baba is a brand.
Some excellent people came with awesome ideas, just nailed it!!!
For smokers
Online shopping
Berry loaf
Most interest…
As a marketing person, I believe “there are no facts, but only opinions.”
So, when you say “honest”, what means “honest”? If you mean “tell everything about the products/service”, they won’t do advertisement, just let customers choose and try.
Apple. The iPhone X costs $999 because fuck you.
Nokia. If you’re building a house, we’ll supply the bricks.
Samsung. Disclaimer: may explode.
Blackberry. Yes, we make phones with actual buttons.
Coca-Cola. Disclaimer: Diet Coke isn’t actually healthy.
Starbucks. No matter your name, we’ll fuck up the spelling.
Yahoo Answers. Quora for cavemen.
Bing. Google for cavemen.
IKEA. You’re only here for the free pencils.
McDonalds. Have a Big Mac with a side of McDiabetes.
Nike. That T-shirt you’re wearing was made by an 8-year old in Bangladesh.
PornHub. Face it, even your dog watches porn.
Market based on honesty. All we have is our reputation!
Trust is the cornerstone of my business! For over 3 decades, I have been repairing and restoring vintage watches. Customers across North America and recently as far away as England have been sending me their watches for repair and restoration. Trusting someone with a family heirloom is not easy, but my 30 years of experience as a gold smith and watch / clock repair person has bolstered my reputation in the industry.
My advice is to set the right expectations and keep your word even if it costs you money. Your reputation is priceless.
Mark Marshall Vintage Watch Restoration. http://www.Ticktockmojo.com
* Patanjali: Just deemed to be herbal we do use chemicals.
* Fair and lovely: You know its not going to work for your fairness still buy it you may get a job with our cream.
* Fair and handsome: Male version of fair and lovely.
* Axe deo: even a fly wont come near you.
* State bank of India: be ready for long Que at our bank.
*…
Watch this movie. It tackles the issue.
I wrote about this for the inc42 magazine.(for those who don’t know, inc42 is an online magazine covering news related to startups and entrepreneurs)
SnapDeal
Trusted Courier services needed. Urgently. Desperately!!
Flipkart
Wanna learn fundraising? Come to us!
Facebook
We Respect Neither Your Privacy Nor your Data.
Internet Explorer
When nothing else works!
Uber(India)
Can I resume services in this country? Please !!
Apple
If you think the products are expensive, the repairs will rip you apart.
Whatsapp
KIlling your privacy with Baleful Blue Ticks.
Google
If you can’t find it here, probably, it doesn’t exist.
Monopoly- Probably the only time when me and my bestfriend fought over money. Fake money .
Amazon – The reason I like staying indoors.
Pokemon Go- The only time I told my mum I was going to play OUTSIDE .
Kick starter- Lets make money
Linkedin- I dont need a linkedin account. I have facebook.
Coca Cola- The reason why I am chubby.
Cheerios – The picture says it all.
BSNL- Annoying people since forever.
Youtube- My home away from home.
Candy crush- Begging for lives.
Netflix – Lets search!
Nokia – User not found .
Sharpie – Turning people into artists since Forever.
Coca Cola- Still the reason why I am fat.
Twitter- Lets argue with random people!
Twitter * Again* – Cuz I have my family on facebook.
Facebook – People “Like” me here.
Lays – Buy air and get some chips free.
AXE – The reason you are probably still single.
Crayola – We offer one useless crayon.
Instagram – Turning people pretty since 2010.
Apple – Ipaid.
And now for the showstopper
Quora – Where People actually read.
Source : Google
Victor Allen’s
WhatsApp – Breaking relationships by colour Blue
Subway – All your calories at one place
Volkswagen- No one can DEFEAT this DEVICE
OYO Rooms – Giving birth to great Photographers
Set max – Repeat mode on
Fair and Handsome – You are black use it
Maruti – Because you can’t afford BMW
Nokia – We didn’t do anything wrong but somehow we lost
Honesty is the best policy. Indeed. So, lets look at the company advertisements if they have been totally honest. Lets go in a chronological order.
Apple. We make you look rich with one mirror selfie, you attention grabber.
AXE. Fragrance lasts less than the advertisement, Trust me.
BSNL. We have full potential to annoy you, that is how government works.
Coca Cola . Brown colored water, sugar and Carbon-dioxide.
Facebook. Stalk people easily.
Flipkart. We want to be like Amazon. So try buying from us.
Fair and Lovely. Makes you neither fair nor lovely, 1 crore challenge, accepted?
Google. An official site to check the internet connectivity.
Gold flake. We control population. The other way round.
Instagram. We can fix your face, you ugly looking b*tch!
Lays. One cannot survive without air. More air than any other brand.
Linked-in. Connect to people unnecessarily.
Mc-Donalds. You won’t get what you see in the advertisement.
Mortein. Equally suffering but than better than dengue.
Maggi. Survival meal for college students.
Pepsi. We are cola cola, in a different packing.
Quora. Copy-paste. Report. Collapse.
Ray-ban. Watch your crush, without getting caught.
Red Bull. Pay more for shit tasting Cough syrup.
Twitter. 140 letters. Show me what you got baby!
Samsung. Can’t afford an iPhone, you’re welcome to have a “Blast”!
Starbucks. Coffee+Fb selfie+Instagram selfie = 300 bucks.
Subway. Smell of bread=30 days old daily worn unwashed socks. Promise!
Wikipedia. Get all your homework and assignments online.
Did you like it? Want more stuff like this?
Nice!
Hi! I am Aditya Srinivas (के आदित्य श्रीनिवास) . You can follow me for more like this.
I bumped into this post by M.O.M (Mad Over Marketing) page. These are all killer Here goes :
Instagram :
Uno :
iPhone :
Facebook :
Skype :
And finally, the most important : MAGGI!
Wikipedia :
Mohit Jaripatke Thank you for this image.
Tinder – Breaking more relationships than making
WhatsApp – Some sensible chats, lots of nonsense forwards
Facebook – Suck looking at other people’s awesome lives
Snapchat- Don’t live at the moment
Here are some
The world would be very rude 😀
our savior
“reality” television
Wii did they do this? 🙁
watch your step
Just bing it
everytime…
Absolute truth
Source : Google Images
Game of Thrones characters can be the best fit for a multiplicity of brands across products and categories.
Let’s look at some witty advertisement posters for famous brands ft. Game of Thrones characters:
Because finding the right match on matrimonial websites is important:
Because size does matter:
Because who knows what would happen at the next wedding you attend:
Because happy moments need to be captured:
Let’s free all our animals:
For when you want teleport cargo:
Just no fire during a flight please:
This is a question that always taps a nerve in people. The basic assumption we all have is that companies are lying about their products and services – either overtly or by omission. After 50 some years in this business, I can say without hesitation that this assumption is true.
While many of the humerous takes on product ads in this thread are both funny and accurate, they also point out one very important fact.
Many people (perhaps most) recognize the falsity behind the advertising – and buy the product anyway. Think about that for a minute.
One of the things that will make an adman laugh his ass off is when someome says, “advertising has no effect on me”. Of course it does, and the more you think it doesn’t the more it works on you. That’s why compan…
These are the brands with their “ honest tag lines”
Because we know you are ugly
Helping control population
Normal mode or Active Mode, it’s…
Lays: Buy a packet of air and get chips free.
Facebook – See how your life is worse compared to your friends.
For Airlines Companies:
Indigo – We beat our customers
Jet Airways – We beat our competition but not our customers
Air India – We don’t beat our customers. We get beaten by our MP’s
Go Air – We don’t have customers
Air Vistara – We don’t have planes
Kingfisher – If our boss was here, we would have beaten him
The above all are intended on a f1unny note. No offences indicated to the airlines.
Durex
Let’s make sex expensive
Telegram
Copyright is a flawed concept
Bisleri
It’s B-I-S-L-E-R-I
Twitter
Different policy for different Nations
Coca Cola
Colourful carbonated water with tons of Sugar
BSNL
Not in Compitition
Tata Sky
Sports channels not included
Kingfisher
King is fishing in UK
KTM
Buy Petrol Pump too
Instagram
Now more than a photo sharing app
Apple
Different branding same product
Truecaller
We make you alert
LinkedIn
We are becoming Facebook
UPI (Unified Payment Interface)
Throw your cards away!
Microsoft Edge
Still same as Internet Exprorer
Alt Balaji
No connections with Raj Kundra
Apple: nothing says rich better than our average iPhone
Colgate: because you need your toothpaste to taste like a candy too & dazzle like a tiara
Lux: fooling you since 1990 about celebrities using this heavily perfumed soap
Samsung: because you know very well you can’t afford an iPhone but do want a better one than Microsoft
Fair & lovely: fairness solves all problems including stupidity
Magnum : because eating a 20 rs cornetto is too mainstream
Aquafina: water for rich people
Patanjali: only thing natural is our name
Maggi: it won’t finish in 2 minutes but you will still buy it
Complan: because fooling ambitious parents who want tall kids is easier than 6 year old kids
Axe: if you smell good,hot women from other planets too will jump on you like a fly
Tresemme : chemical bath for your hai
Real juice: vitamins for ignorant people
‘This product is actually not that bad!’
(‘…and we’re paying for your tv and google’)
It’s not worth advertising a bad product. It might be disgusting. It might be bad for you. But someone wants it. If it’s not you then you’re not in danger of being influenced by it. If you justifiably hate it no ad will make you buy it. There may be genius ad types who can work miracles but they get the best return by sticking to decent stuff. I actually like coke, even if i can only drink it freezing cold.
Advertising distorts. It can be deceitful. But it can also be good. It makes you hear about useful things. You can both benefit. Would we better of overall without it? Maybe. Not certainly. (But I’d certainly like the choice to pay a few quid for an ad free, untracked google and suchlike.)
I’ll start with the obvious one
Apple: we have always wanted people’s kidneys
Microsoft: Hello this is Michael from the microsoft service center.
Adidas: We supply to the Russians.
Amul: We target kids for our butter. Or we make adults dance.
Baskin Robbins: our mixed flavours looks bad but taste so good.
Nokia: We used to rule the world.
Yahoo: Same
eBay: You guys too?
Amazon: Please don’t look for free stuff, we don’t have them.
Epic games: We release free games every week for you poor people.
Steam: We update every hour, don’t question it.
Duolingo: We might kidnap ur parents if u don’t finish your Spanish classes.
Classmate: We are the luxury of the students.
Dairy milk: Without me, you can’t get a kiss.
KitKat: I’m not the only thing u can break.(points at gf)
Coaching centers: Give me money and I will give you stress.
Clothing/shoe shops: One dollar less and all the girls will come get the rest.
Well this is all I can do for now.
Have a great day
My try to give some honest slogans for famous brands, floating in India:
Ray Ban- forget the frame, purchase my name.
KFC – Its finger licking good, because I have added all the fats I could.
Starbucks- just ordinary coffee, but my mug is your trophy.
Patanjali- firstly I criticise everything Videshi, then I market the same calling it Desi.
Apple- Think Different, my logo will make the difference.
Maggi- Taste bhi, Health bhi, motape ka wealth bhi.
Kingfisher- King of good times, my owner looted you and fled with his crimes.
Asian Paints- Har ghar kuch kehta hai, gharwalo ki aukad jo isme rehta hai.
Kurkure- Tedha hai par mera hai, tere vulgar dimag me leda hai!!
Thumbs Up- Taste the thunder, by jumping like monkeys and stealing it from the truck.
Instagtam- was a decent photo app, now trying to copy Snapchat
Facebook- Explore the world of Angel Priya and Lover boy Rahul.
Manforce- If you lower your pace, see the packet with Sunny Leones face.
Nokia- Lost my own connection while connecting people.
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&ei=tMLoVITtLonToATKuYLwDg&url=http://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3Dq-RLqLx1iYI&ved=0CB0Q3ywwAA&usg=AFQjCNEWFPm9Mylx6rWDHgl74II2nKHvSg&sig2=BIHu1yn_ljJqIZ_tUKgcLQ
By using the Don’t ask, don’t tell method. Basically, failing to say something doesn’t count as lying. Here’s how I’d advertise my line of products if I sold them
Clothes
What I say Look at these pretty clothes!
What I won’t say: These clothes were made in a sweatshop in some far-away country.
Food
This food is yummy!
This food could kill you ten years later.
Cars
This is a fast car!
This car drinks fuel like a fish!
Phones
This phone does a lot of cool stuff!
You need to charge it every five minutes.
Failing to mention a negative doesn’t necessarily count as dishonesty.
What happens when a stock footage company decides to advertise their services, and tell the truth, at the same time?:
May or may not work reasonably. Might waste a lot of your time. We don’t much care as long as you keep paying.
brand Tag-Lines were honest, What would they say?
Innerwears- Innerwear, not character, make the man.
2. Hair products- You just need editing software to achieve this unrealistic look, but do buy our product.
3. Fairness products- We take advantage of your insecurity, plus we know that you are racist too.
4. Deo/Perfumes- Homage to primitive human civilization.
5. Chocolate- We teach you how to eat seductively.
1) ads of fairness creams
Om nom nom/ no mom no
2. We help the environment. We pack CO2.
3. Follows you nowhere
4. Honest Indian helmet advertisement
Image source- instagram.com/thefakeadco
In my experience of advertising and marketing, I have realized that the best way of honest marketing is ‘Referral’.
The main key to referral honest marketing is to meet the expectations of the customer. You set an expectation and meet that expectation of the customer.
If your product is really awesome, helps more people and is changing their daily lives, there is no need for you to advertise at all, you can solely depend upon your customers who will do the actual work for you. Instead of spending in advertising, the brand can invest in nurturing the referral sources. That will make a brand be remembered forever.
When Colgate was first introduced in India, it was the only tooth paste at that time. However it became such an integral part of people’s life that for them tooth paste means colgate. Even they consider other tooth pastes like pepsodent, etc as colgate only, not tooth paste.
Honesty is the best policy……. If the product is good then you have to give guarantee of the product …….
In business first impression is the last impression….
If the product is not up to the guarantee given of it …… Then people will not buy it ……
LinkedIn – Connect with people for no reason at all.
Some funny Meme’s
Dude, you know Ratan Tata? Yea, I’m friends with him on Linkedin.
So Linkedin is your only social network, Tell me more about these friends you have.
I don’t have your CV and I don’t know who you are but i’ll Look you up on linkedin and I’ll find you.
This shit ain’t Facebook…, It’s Linkedin.
Thanks
Hope you like it
Eight O’Clock
Google – Making sure you are connected to the internet since 1998
You Tube – Advertisements are always instant.
Veet – We show you how to wax a hairless leg and you can go on and try on a gorilla.
6 Different Ways to Advertise Products
1.Online Advertising
2.Newspaper Ads
3.Radio Advertising
4.Public Speaking
5.Event Sponsorship
6.Television Advertising
The Walt Disney Company
‘’We just have Iconic Characters for wasting yours and your Child’s Life.”
WWE
“We make great wrestlers just by adding some Scripts.”
Facebook
“We have Social Media power,We use it for Elections.”
Twitter
‘’Tweet like a bird,Go in Politics Forever”
InstaGram
“We help you share your photos around the world,So that people can make bad use of it”
Here we go…
Patanjali — Only we are original all other brands are fake 😉
Nike – Just do it wait wait…do you have enough money ??
Surf Exel – Well ; daag acche nhi h 😉 (well dirt isn’t good )
Instagram – Mask bad photos with awesome filters.
Thums up- Taste the flavoured liquid ( coz your taste doesn’t matter )
Nokia – Who knows us nowadays?
Lamborghini – Naam hi kaphi hai 😉 ( only the name is sufficient )
Apple – Wanna show-off ? Okay great (we will give same features nd specification similar to other phones available at lower price ; but a t higher price )
Mountain dew – Just a normal cold drink .
Fogg – Really goes long but just for 30–45 mins 😉
Samsung – Bombing is not a crime 😉
** Thank you ! **
Advertising doesn’t mean that to cheat the peoples……..
Advertise the food items adding so much of chemicals doesn’t allow…that advertisement is a honest…
advertise is the procedure to let others know what is new in the market…..
To be aware that it shouldn’t take the life of others…
Is pepsi okay?
1. Dominos and Pizza Hut: Pay some tax(Service tax, VAT, etc.) and get a pizza free!!!
2. Airtel, Idea: Who cares about customer services? Our plan is to destroy Jio.
3. Gillette: Razor blades on a subscription basis.
4. Hp Printers: We are the only ones to provide printers at the cost of an ink cartridge and an ink cartridge at the price of a printer.
5. HDFC, ICICI- Our sole purpose is to provide a free credit card to every customer and suck his/her blood with the highest interest rates possible.
6. Coca-Cola, Pepsi – We aim to suck all rivers dry in India by 2025.
7. Apple IPhone – Features of a $ 120 Android phone only at $750.
8. Google – You have no other choice.
9. Microsoft – We plan to continue the acquiring spree.
10. Maggi – I’m always the king of the hill as long as people aren’t health conscious.
Marketing is not something where you have to be honest. As if you are honest you will not be able to promote your product or you will not be able to get business. Lets not be honest but try to provide more and more information which will help people understand your product.
I know what you’re looking for . A bunch of biting satirical skits exposing the corruption and mendacity of the corporate sector. I mean – they’re all corrupt lying bastards? we all know that!.
But my experience (over 2000 adverts print and Tv and radio and digital) in just under 40 years is that most fee paying clients want to tell it like it is.
Look, nothing sells a bad product twice – yes bad news if you’re talking a car – but for most things it’s the fastest way to ostracizing your customers.
Almost all companies I worked with respected their advertising agencies and would be shocked if we’d ever suggested any stretching of thre truth. It just damages the brand.
Now, what you may be talking about are companies that simply rely on selling. They have a brand but don’t spend any money on it, instead they run “direct” ads which rely on a high volume of sales. To do that some of them will stretch the truth – lie. They don’t care if people won’t buy the product again. They don’t pay their agencies a fair wage. They stamp and sneer at any brand values embued to their ads – they simply believe that any time not selling is a loss. They’re normally Marketing Directors who are pretty well paid but have extremely high target sales to hit and know they will only last three years at best.
So – they will countenance lying. I’ve rarely worked for these people , but believe me it’s soooo unpleasant that I’ve seen agencies implode with the pressure of working with a dictator. The relationship should be a partnership.
Anyhoo
They make up a very small underbelly of marketing which for the most part is extremely honest and hard working. The bigger the company the more they absolutely wouldn’t risk a PR blunder like lying.
I’ve wotked with P&G Swatch, SABMiller to name but three and they would have thrown us out of the boardroom if we’d suggested they lie.
Sorry there’s no collusion here.
Oh hang on …
Honest Advertisements would look like:-
Nike:- If you didnt get enough ticks in your answer sheets, you cant afford this one either.
Redbull:- Hybrid, liquid, tasteless and expensive version of Glucon-D
Audi:- Pay 6 0′s to get back 4
Lays:- Coz you can live without food but not without air
Volkswagen:- Cant afford our car? Das Auto
Big Bazar:- Pay more for less.
Google:- We arent Duckduck go, we know what you do.
Suzuki:- We make a hatchback, then its booty grows in size and we get a new model of car
Apple:- Same features, same eaten apple, just Higher prices.
Samsung:- Carry our bombs anywhere, without being caught.
Came up with all those just now. Hope you liked them.
Oh the possibilities! Here’s a few choice advertising slogans off the top of my head, not just for companies but other organisations too:
Facebook – Screwing with your privacy settings since 2004.
FourSquare – Stalking made even easier than with Facebook.
Irn-Bru – Come and have a go if you think you’re hard enough, Coke! (Irn-Bru outsells Coke and every other soft drink in Scotland)
Starbucks – Never knowingly paid UK Corporation Tax.
NERF – The ultimate in man-portable silly weaponry.
The UK Independence Party – Chaos, Panic and Disorder… our work here is done.
The Republican Party – Denying the possibility of man-made Climate Change since the concept was first floated.
The Democratic Republic of North Korea – We’re right and you’re all wrong.
Greenpeace – Yes, that baby seal is super cute, but cute never saved anything.
My Little Pony – Cute is our marketing strategy.
The United Nations – Desperately trying to get 200 different countries to agree on something since 1945.
The Acme Nuclear Bunker Company – Let’s face it we’re all screwed. Free copy of Fallout with every Bunker purchased as a training manual to deal with the aftermath of the impending apocalypse.
[I made the last company up, but it totally should exist!]
Advertising for all US brands is regulated by the FTC. All claims made in advertising must be supportable. Violators are subject to serious penalties. Big brands in particular have Legal departments that review all advertising to ensure compliance. To answer your question directly, it would be exactly as it is currently. I just wish politics looked ads were subject to the same regulations. Advertising and Marketing
These are all amusing answers. But if you’re really asking how to advertise without lying, the key is to focus on the positive.
For instance, Coke may be full of chemicals and sugar, but it’s quite refreshing. No one can argue with that.
If your cars are weak when it comes to performance, focus on their stellar safety rating, or how comfortable the ride is.
Most advertising doesn’t lie. It’s just selective with the facts it shares. An exception would be 24-Hour Energy, which uses every trick in the book, including making misleading claims and offering a “portion” of each sale to a charity, like breast-cancer awareness or war veterans. That portion is usually very small and the minimal contribution they promise to donate, regardless of sales, is a tax write-off.
Not all products are bad, so that is not an issue often.
But perhaps increasing transparency in revenue and other traditional areas where not everyone is aware could be a step in that direction.
If a company was to be totally honest it can go two ways. Some may appreciate the honesty and continue with the company others may be turned off.
I’m sure if they had to be very honest they would still advertise but play on the openly transparent relationships.
LAYS- Get 10 chips free with a packet of air.
Dominos- welcome obesity
Maggi- special pack:Cooks 2 min noodles in 6 min.
Hero- more than advertising about product,we inspire people to work hard for their dreams or to enjoy the life or to become a good person!Songs make it easier.
Tide- The white clothes we show do not even exist in real life. But we still feel that people believe us!
Fair and lovely- Use our product and get darkened,damaged skin in just 4 days!
Vatika shampoo- Use our product full of chemicals (which we show as natural) and see increase in hairfall in 2 weeks!
Twitter – Waste your time in 140 characters or less.
Facebook – Spoil your life if you can.
Google – Ruin your life in searching.
Their tag line with star mark will say “buy at your own risk” !
Buy our soap/shampoo/deo so we can pay the actress to ask you to buy it.
You like the actress, you don’t care what soap/shampoo/deo you buy. So why not buy the one she is telling you to buy?
> Forgive my over-enthusiasm. Misinterpreted the question and wrote an answer to a slightly different question : If companies were to be totally honest, how would they advertise themselves?
Looking at the most valuable brands :
1)
Apple:
Ah, the early adopter -Burn !
(price reductions post launch)
2)
Microsoft :
We are the forefront of Innovation
(Thank God for Acquisitions)
3)
Coca-Cola:
LOL, you found it out only now ?
(Obesity linkage)
4)
IBM:
We’ll try selling Apple now
(IBM’s unsuccessful PC biz sale to Lenovo & the recent Apple partnership)
5)
Google:
We bow to the great firewall of China
(China censorship)
6)
McDonalds:
Mcjob won’t get you a Happy meal !
(McJob == a low-paying job that requires little skill and provides little opportunity for advancement)
7)
GE:
We do pay out the tax benefits !
(General Electric did not owe taxes in 2010, in fact had a
tax refund [ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tax_refund ]
of $3.2 billion – the same year they increased exec pay by 27% to $75.9 million for their top 5 executives)
8)
Intel:
…
Who needs makeup?
My account on Facebook . Go on!
Making it nearly impossible to talk to people.
And Coffee for poor people, too!
And Rich man’s peanuts.
She’s the actual Selfie Queen.
2 minute silence.
I still hate you Vinay, Himanshu and Harshit.
I prefer Heineken. But, whatever!
REAL Fruit Juice. I stress on the word REAL.
In case of emergencies.
Choke to death. For the mosquitoes, obviously.
HOPE. Strong word, you see.
Nostalgia, of past and, yesterday.
Let’s not offend anybody.
SOURCE: ScoopWhoop (Let’s be honest, Who cares!)
From sourcing of raw material to production to its sales, the only stage that’s close to being honest is advertising. In majority of cases the parity amongst products comes from the creative idea. Everything stated in ads is true. What matters is which fact and how entertainingly they say it. Consumer and law will not allow advertising to make false claims. If they do then there are implications. So companies already do honest advertising. How interecting? That decides their sales.
Advertisements are the key parts for products to be successful. But they are not always honest, which is the high price.
FACEBOOK : Online Database.
iPHONE : Attention graber.
TATA NANO : Must need insurance car.
SET MAX : Sooryavansham with some other films.
LAYS CHIPS : Stylist Air Baloon with some chips in it.
GOOGLE : Official site to check the internet connectivity
MAGGI : Your college’s official dinner.
WIKIPEDIA : U R Welcome, Students !!
LAPTOPS : Best time pass instrument.
LINKEDIN : Connect and endorse people for no reason.
KINGFISHER : Lord of Bad times.
TWITTER : Wars within 140 words.
PEPSI : When there is no beverage.
JOCKEY : Pay but can’t endorse.
QUORA : Copy-pasting business.
SABtv : Only for TMKOC
1)MOVING FORWARD AND FORWARD AND FORWARD.
2)AN UPDATE IS AVAILABLE.
3) The ANTIVIRUS VIRUS.
4) MAY BE IT IS PHOTOSHOP.Maybelline is the company
5) Hacker friendly storage for your personal data.
6)You are welcome ,college students
7) drink n drive thru.taco bell is the company
8) we have a salad bar for some reason.
9) here for you during the midlife crisis.
10) wii would like you to throw the controller into your t.v.
11) more dough , less toppings.dominos pizza
love me or hate me you cannot ignore me.cocacola
We have a burger for vegetarians too.kfc
when you care enough to give a card mass produces by a corporation.
the only pair of shoes that have never left your shoe rack.
Makes all the women flock away from you
here you throw this away.yellow pages
We serve you decaf if you are rude.starbucks
WE CONTROL EVERYTHING
Dont expect luggage to arrive (DELTA) delta airlines
we have not read the terms and conditions
Finally
Thank you
Reebok – I am what I am, since I can’t be what I am not.
Nike – Just do it, with a Puma. It’s cheaper.
3M – Innovation. We suck at it.
Sony – Make Believe. Buy something else.
IMAX – Think big. With your glasses on.
Canon – See what we mean. Every Tom Dick & Harry can be a photographer now.
Kodak – Share moments. Share life. On Facebook & Instagram.
FedEx – When there is no tomorrow. We will deliver it a day after tomorrow.
Hallmark – When you care enough to send the very best. Visit an Archies Gallery.
McDonalds – I’m loving it as I get fat.
KFC – Finger lickin’ good, brutally butchered chicken.
Nokia – Connecting people with Nokia 1110 .
Apple – Think different. Pay more.
Jaguar – Born to perform, for the millionaires.
Hyundai – Drive Your Way, to a Maruti Suzuki Showroom.
BMW – Sheer Driving Pleasure, in your dreams.
MasterCard – There are some things money can’t buy, for everything else there’s MasterCard & VISA & American Express.
Youtube – Broadcast yourself, you can’t do anything else.
Wipro – Applying Thought where not needed.
Sansui – Born in Japan Entertaining The World, on another planet.
Monster. com– Never Settle, for one job.
British Petroleum – Beyond Petroleum & oil spills.
They will truly avoid Advertise as it will show the things which is harmful for the Brand.
They would never be the honest as this would decrease the Sales and this would decrease the TurnOver.
If Some Companies do these –
Samsung –
Buy this Phone and It will eb get start Hang after a 8 months of use
I would rather show you below .
Source :marketing strategies
scoopshop.com - scoopshop Resources and Information.
Google: We rule the world without our own army.
Apple: Our logo is expensive.
Amazon : Get an Amazon Prime Subscription.
Flipkart : We keep increasing our delivery charges everyday.
Airtel : That annoying 4G girl.
Vodafone : That cute pug.
Samsung : My corporate masters use an iPhone. FML.
BBQ nation : No one gives a shit about our main course.
Nokia : Makers of the indestructible 3310, that’s it, end of the story.
Microsoft : Our employees prefer Macbook.
Haldiram : Indian snacks + preservatives.
Twitter : Trump’s open-field toilet.
Tupperware : Convert cheap-plastic to non-cheap product.
KFC : The Chicken in our name is silent.
NCERT : Good content in bad colour.