Do women think “coffee dates” mean a man is cheap?

Do women think “coffee dates” mean a man is cheap?

You can check the answer of the people under the question at Quora “why coffee dates are a bad idea

0 thoughts on “Do women think “coffee dates” mean a man is cheap?”

  1. I can’t speak for all women, but I tend to think someone who wants to meet for coffee is some combination of the following things: 1. in recovery 2. cheap or poor 3. not that optimistic about our future.
    None of these are so bad, but it’s what I would think.

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  2. Asking me for coffee indicates that to me I’m not worth more of a man’s time and interest. It takes me a lot of time to get ready (in whatever I do), to make that good impression (and it’s an impression I keep up, because I take pride in myself and my appearance). Why would I spend a 45 minutes to get ready, just to travel another ten minutes or more, for some cheapskate in a loud coffee shop, who wants the cheapest coffee and 30 minutes of my time talking about B.S. about his former wife?
    I have lots of coffee, at home, that I can make in more gastronomically creative ways than a Starbucks ever could, and go through better profiles of men who are not cheapskates.

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  3. Over the last six years, I have gone on a LOT of dates. I’d say that I feel a connection with maybe one out of every seven hundred people or so, so I try to play a numbers game.
    It never even occurred to me thst a coffee date would be cheap. What it does say is that I’m not really enthusiastic about the chance of a spark and perhaps he feels the same. I’ll suggest coffee if really pressured for a date, for example. Do the coffee, have the date, validate the “no connection” assumption.
    I honestly am uncomfortable with a big show of a date in most circumstances. Again, I don’t have a high success rate, so I feel guilty if a man woos me with flashy things. Also, effort and thoughtfulness is much more likely to win me over than dropping a bundle.
    Having said that, “cheap” is not a turnoff to me, anyhow. It is really fun and decadent to spend money now and again on something fabulous, but I appreciate someone who is careful.
    In the end, it comes down to the person. If we like you, a walk in the park will win us over. If we don’t…virtually nothing will win is over.

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  4. Yes, they are cheap, low effort, boring dates for people who lack creativity and have too much time on their hands. If I have a couple of free hours, I want to do something fun and interesting. Go to an arcade, the museum, bowling, have a bite to eat somewhere, drinks at a fun cocktail bar, rock climbing gym, ice skating, the list goes on. And ALL of these activities are inexpensive.
    I never accept coffee dates from men. They are not worth my time getting ready and getting to the coffee shop, only to inevitably meet up with some boring dull guy who is too cheap, lazy and uncreative to think of a proper date.

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  5. To me…YES.
    There is a saying , coffee is cheap , lunch is an interview, dinner is Romance ❤️ which I have always gone by. If a guy asks me out for drinks or coffee I will suggest dinner, if he refuses I’m out. No way am I putting on all my glam just for a drink!’ it’s far too low investment and casual for me. I always think a guy whos keen to impress will do whatever is necessary to accommodate a lady. And coffee or drinks dosent make any sort of impression at all tbh.

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  6. In my 20s, I didn’t know better. I had little to no standards. Ended up dating some horrible men who treated me badly, which made me feel even worse about myself.
    I had a boyfriend who would make me pay him back $0.30 for a plastic ruler.
    Another one b*tched about spending $30 on dinner with me, that he could have eaten $2 chicken rice for a week with that money. (Conveniently ignoring the fact that he was the one who picked the place and also he ate twice as much as me.)
    Dating stingy men sucked.
    In my 30s, I decided that enough is enough.
    Do I think “coffee dates” means that a man is cheap?
    Yes .
    This is just my opinion though, so please feel free to disagree and write your own answer.
    A man who asks a woman out on a coffee date is looking to minimize on how much he spends on the date, because he isn’t quite sure how he feels towards her.
    He is much more interested in protecting his own interests than anything else.
    This is the problem here. It’s NOT about money.
    If you read enough answers on such topics, you’ll find that there are quite a lot of men who enthusiastically advocate coffee dates to “filter out” the “gold diggers”.
    If you are dating with such a toxic mindset, my recommendation is: Don’t date.
    If you start out the dating process fully on guard and thinking you have to protect your own interests WHILE trying to figure out how soon you can get into her pants, spending as little money as possible, what does that make YOU?
    Men who are seeking genuine relationships dont do this because they’re looking at the long game.
    Women are extremely intuitive. We aren’t stupid either.
    If a man is super interested and really into a woman, he will want to know how best to impress her and would be happy to take her out to dinner at a restaurant she likes. He WANTS to make her happy. It doesn’t have to be fancy and expensive. But it shows some genuine sincerity.
    It means the guy is not casually hedging his “dating budget” on many different women. One dinner date is probably equivalent to 8–10 coffee dates. A man can easily go on 5–10 coffee dates in a week, but highly unlikely to go on 5–10 dinner dates in a week or even in a month.
    Dinner dates are for romance.
    Lunch dates are for business.
    Coffee dates are for cheapskates .
    You may argue that maybe the guy is not a cheapskate but he just wants to avoid gold diggers. Fair enough. But I wouldn’t want to date a guy with that kind of toxic mindset anyway.
    So by avoiding coffee dates, I still win.
    Context matters. If you already have a dinner date coming up over the weekend, and the guy is super busy but he still wants to squeeze in some time during the week just to see you for half hour over coffee near your office, then sure a coffee date mid week is perfectly fine.
    Otherwise, don’t bother.
    Previously when I was single, I would never agree to go out with a guy for a coffee date. Not for a first date. I have high standards and I won’t apologize for it.
    When you have high standards, you’ll end up with higher quality men who don’t go for low hanging fruit. It’s that simple.
    Now I’m (happily) married, I don’t give a rat’s butt who pays for what, we are a team. My money is his money too. Should I become very wealthy one day, I don’t mind splurging on nice things for both of us. After all, what is wealth without someone special in your life to enjoy it with?
    I am a very generous and giving person, I enjoy spending money to pamper people whom I love and care about. I could never be with someone who’s self-centered, calculative and miserly. Period.

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  7. What ? no. Who thinks this?
    Coffee is used as a place where people can meet without it being a restaurant or something more formal.
    IT is to talk and not be surrounded by distractions much, but it is public enough that the girl doesn’t get kidnapped.
    The first thing that happens is that two strangers like each other’s appearance. So to get to know the person there has to be some talking and investingating if the person is worth putting more time and money into and move forward to dating or something more steady.
    Coffee is a good place to talk and get to know someone, and if you don’t like coffee, there are also teas, waters and hot chocolates there too. GEEZ! there is something for even the non c…

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  8. Yes! It’s funny that I’m not he only one who thinks so. Or it makes me think he’s only after looks, wants to see what I look like and only considers physical attraction.

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  9. Coffee date is meant to be light and noncommittal. If you are meeting a total stranger for the first time, or both parties aren’t sure but willing to give it a half-hearted try, you grab coffee together.
    In the corporate world sometimes we have a short meeting to prepare for the big meeting. Coffee date is a short chat to figure out if a serious dinner date is warranted. If the coffee klatch doesn’t work, then you’re not wasting time and money on a full-blown date. If you make a connection, then you can go fancy the next time around.
    If your woman gets offended by coffee date, that is a good thing. You can safely strike her off your list of potential partners. She is taking herself way too seriously, and you should count yourself lucky that she shows her true colors early.

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  10. No I don’t. I think coffee dates are great. You meet, you poke under the surface a little bit, and leave all possibilities on the table. It puts no pressure on both parties. And we can all squeeze in a little coffee date now and then. I think it’s great. =)

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  11. Some of the responses here are quite funny. So, let’s get this straight. According to some women, a man who they literally just met is supposed to splurge $200 in some fancy restaurant, or else they’re cheapskates. This shows that they’re self-entitled narcissists who care more about how much someone spends on them, so that they can feel special, rather than about getting to know someone. If they cared more about the latter, the context in which it takes place wouldn’t matter (to a reasonable degree, of course).
    By the way, this seems to only really be common among American women; this idea that a man you just met should somehow be head-over-heels for you from the get-go, and this better manifest itself on the first date, or else . I sometimes don’t get women.

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  12. hey man, I offered girls champagne and wine dates in brampton, toronto, gurgaon, bombay, they thought I was ugly! It doesn’t matter if it’s coffee or champagne it seems! Even my own Punjab called me ugly! I’m actually a 6 feet tall international male model turning into a RockStarRapper!! Fastest rapper in all of South Asia India! (I’m not a pornstar, I’m a RockStarRapper)

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  13. Absolutely not. I think they see it as a way to get to know someone and to decide if they’d want to go on a real date with them or not.

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  14. No no no.
    At least coffee is not cheap at all in China.
    A “tall” (read “small”) cup of cappuccino in Starbucks in Shanghai is 28 RMB. You want a blueberry muffin too to fill the time you guys can’t find anything to say? Another 20 RMB.
    And this is what you can eat with 48 RMB in a typical local diner.

    Do women think “coffee dates” mean a man is cheap?

    Do women think “coffee dates” mean a man is cheap?

    Do women think “coffee dates” mean a man is cheap?

    Do women think “coffee dates” mean a man is cheap?

    (Images are from the internet.)
    I mean ALL of them.
    But personally, I prefer neither a coffee date nor a diner date. I would love a PICNIC date.
    We schedule a good weather day, discuss the place, shop together in the morning, figure out each other’s food loves & hates. Eat, talk, watch clouds when have nothing to say. Run fast if it suddenly rains. The time we spend together might be lovely, or a bit awkward. We may have totally different preferences and argue what a sandwich should be, and whether washing hands in a stream make them cleaner or dirtier. We will know each other better.
    Isn’t that a date meant to be?
    Oh and it will cost us even less money, but more time, efforts, and considerations for each other, which, is never cheap.

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  15. No—they think your arent man enough to ask her to open her legs for you and thus respects you less for not defending the petty person you are—next time tou call a girl tell her when dou have dinner??? Good i will pick u up one hour after that

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  16. Yes. I hate the offer, because I feel bad for saying no, but it is a lack of interest, cheap (also those guys usually don’t pay for your coffee, which auto disqualifies you, because a woman paying on a date for herself means it’s a friend’s outing), and basic. In my 20s, I had tons of bad coffee dates. The only coffee date that had anything that kinda worked was one where we picked up coffee and immediately went to the funniest bowling alley, in ever. Also, I have coffee at home. I’m over 30 now. If that’s what you want, I don’t have the time.

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  17. Absolutely not.
    They’re a great way to get to know someone in a low pressure environment. No distractions. Just a chance to chat and try to find out if the relationship is worth pursuing.
    Sure, coffee dates aren’t expensive but that’s not the reason behind them. Would you be asking the same question if he’d asked you to go for a glass of wine after work? Probably not. And I think of a coffee date as a slightly more casual version of the same thing.

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  18. No. Coffee dates are the auditions of the dating scene. It’s a low pressure, public, low cost way for both parties to find out if there’s any chemistry, if you have anything in common, or any interest in taking it to the real date level. You can stick around and talk if it’s going well or you can have somewhere else to be if it isn’t. Coffee dates are an easy “wanna get some coffee” way to express interest without going all in when you don’t know someone yet.

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  19. I hope so! That’s be a good way of filtering out the ones who have that as a criterion.
    Back when I dated that meant I liked coffee ’cause you know, coffee.

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  20. Yes. Women think a guy is cheap if he asks for a coffee date. If you spend more money you are respected.
    Even having a costly smart phone and cool gadgets like a good digital camera good looks and speaking in a way not lengthy not short helps dating people
    Once in dating business one should try to understand the Pschycology of the guy?girl.
    And needs to act smart.

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  21. I can really only answer for myself, not all women. But I think coffee is a GREAT first date/ casual date idea. A coffee house or a Starbucks or such is a safe place for a woman to get to know something about a guy.
    It’s also a great way for a person who might not make as much money to treat someone to a nice afternoon snack.
    I take my husband out on Coffee Dates all the time, it’s a nice way for us to have some ‘us’ time.

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  22. Not necessarily. The guy who invited you for coffee date, he is trying to get to know you a bit or more. It could take nearly an hour. He pays everything. If he is really interested in you…. So, he would call you to invite you for a date to a nice restaurant. Don’t rush things. Be patience.
    Long ago, one night a new friend ( psychotherapy) did invited me too. We chatted little by little to know each other better. He’s still around and, I never forget him.

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  23. No. It’s a low-stress way to meet someone, have a chat, and get to know them in a relaxed environment. Plus it’s not in circumstances where you have to ostentatiously decide what to do at the end of the evening, like you might in a pub, so you’re not under pressure to sleep with them after you’ve both been drinking.
    I recommend that whether you are male or female, you don’t behave like this man. If you offer to buy someone a coffee, then don’t take it badly if they don’t want to sleep with you afterwards. This behaviour is cheap and insulting.
    This is how NOT to take a romantic knock back well
    14% of people who responded to that survey said she should have refunded him, which is depressingly entitled. *That* is why I don’t allow strangers to buy me drinks unless I reciprocate. If you don’t want to pay for coffee, then tell them you are going to split the bill and don’t create unnecessary drama.

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  24. I think coffee dates are perfect if people are meeting for the first time. The thing about a coffee date is that it can be as short or long as you want. You can finish your coffee hurriedly and leave in no time if you are not getting the right feel from the person. A meal is a relatively longer engagement, unless it is one of those fast food joints we are talking about. But then, they are not what is in usual parlance called classy . Coffee, although cheaper, is always classy. In India, coffee dates won’t make a man come across as cheap because of the cultural value associated with the drink.

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  25. Coffee dates are the best!
    No awkwardly eating food infront of eachother.
    No feeling awkward ordering the food I really want to eat.
    No Awkward bill splitting/paying convos at the end.
    Best of all if it goes bad you can finish your coffee/tea and move on, with food it’s a far longer process.

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  26. I think coffee dates are simple and a good place to have a good conversation with someone you have barely met. Now if it’s been a couple dates like that and it seems like he doesn’t want to go anywhere else then maybe you should bring up the idea of having dinner one day or going for a movie. If he doesn’t agree on the idea or just ignores it then that is a bad sign he doesn’t really want to spend on a girl. That will be up to the girl now if she wants to continue with that kind of dating.

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  27. Let me take you to a five star hotel thus she replied you are cheap. thats my story. if you start with small beautiful talk n things all goes well. Your behavior is most important.

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  28. From my experience, no, they won’t think the guy is cheap, but take her to a place which is at the same level as a Starbucks or Second Cup. Don’t you dare set the date at a MacDonald’s or a Tim Horton’s!

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  29. No. It means that he would like to have a conversation rather than getting trolleyed and engaging in immediate meaningless, ill advised sex. I would count my blessings. Money is not the issue here, nor should it be. It may surprise you to hear that some women pay their own way no problem.

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  30. No. You have to start somewhere. No need to take you to a fancy restaurant just to find out it was all about the money. We can start small and slowly progresses. It’s about the great conversation you may have. How you May connect or not!

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  31. Taking some slob out for dinner and drinks can be pricey. Chances are she’ll stuff her face and won’t appreciate it anyway. A woman who’s okay with a coffee date could end up being the decent, non pretentious person you’re looking for. It doesn’t matter if a woman thinks a man is cheap…simply eject and discard her and move on…

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  32. At the price of coffee these days, I should say not! Coffee dates are for getting acquainted when you’re not, and for quick talks when time is short. They are good first dates since little is risked and they give a couple a short time to talk and then they can go their own ways, or leave together. I don’t know what women think about it – perhaps they wish for the big meal and a lobster, but the guy would prefer to save that for the fourth date.

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  33. Of course not!
    Coffee dates definitely puts me at ease especially if they are the first few dates. I would definitely want to know the person sitting in a corner of the coffee shop and sipping our coffee relaxed. Lunch or dinner dates are more formal and it takes some time to be a little open with the person.

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  34. I think a coffee date is lack of effort on his part. Plus, who the hell drinks coffee at 4:00 pm. That basically says, I’m spending no more than 45 mins with you.
    I say, no thank you.

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  35. Here is a summary of my thoughts:
    Time: A coffee date is a “limited” time date, Women get asked out a lot and getting trapped on a long date with someone they are not attracted to is not ideal. This is the major appeal of this style of date Not the cost.\
    Cost: If someone says no to a coffee date because they “think” your cheap that might be a good thing that the date doesn’t go ahead. 🙂 especially if you like coffee.
    Creative: Dont limit your coffee to just sitting, you can take a walk, chase puppies in a park, just respect that you need to give her a chance to leave so after the coffee is done, ask “hey do you have time for … “ and maybe have a plan to go to the movies/gallery or a longer walk etc that if things are going well you can do after the coffee.
    Hope this helps.
    Rob

    Eight O’Clock

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  36. What women are you talking about? Not everyone has the same expectations. For myself, I’ve never thought this, and I would even pay for my own beverage (which wouldn’t be coffee because I don’t like coffee).
    Maybe it depends on context. Coffee dates are, in my opinion, great casual dates for getting to know someone before any commitment.
    But if you were giving the impression you wanted to go out somewhere fancy and she puts on her best dress and BAM! You surprise her with a date at the McCafe, she might be disappointed. The thing about coffee dates is to make clear it’s a coffee date from the get-go. You don’t say, “Do you want to go on an exciting, romantic date with me?” You say, “Do you want to get some coffee with me?” So she knows what kind of date it is.
    Coffee dates are great, I love them, even if I hate coffee, but the point is that they are low-key and depending on the relationship, or the context, or the kind of person she is, she might be expecting high-key. Me? I’m a low-key kind of girl.
    It’s not really really about cost, though, but mood. High key might be driving up to a view point and watching the sunset in your fanciest clothes and with a picnic of cheap Champaign and strawberries. Still not expensive, assuming you already own the clothes.

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  37. No, my husband and I enjoy going out for coffee together, even after all these years of being with each other. Sometimes I pay and sometimes he pays, but the most important thing is we’re together enjoying each other’s company .
    Cheers!

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  38. Some do, some don’t. Everyone is different. Rather than think it’s cheap, I would rather worry about being lazy. Make concrete plans and show effort rather than worrying about appearing cheap.

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  40. No! For one, I love coffee, so I’d be pretty happy to go on a coffee date. Going out to cafes/restaurants is really fun, whether it’s a date or with family or friends. Might not be a date, but sometimes my grandparents and I go to Dunkin’ Donuts, and that’s where some of our deepest conversations happen. If I was invited out to a fancy restaurant, I’d love that-it’s a new experience. At the same time, I wouldn’t mind if we just went to McDonald’s. Maybe it’s just because I like food.
    The Starbucks in my area is nice and quiet, which would be intimate. Have a nice drink, maybe a croissant, hold hands across the table, stare into each others’ eyes. Compliment said eyes. Stick two straws in the coffee and pretend you’re sharing a milkshake. You could even turn it into a study date! Or maybe you bring a sketchpad and draw a picture of each other. Make the most of it, savor your coffee, and enjoy the time with your boyfriend.
    If he’s financially insecure, I wouldn’t mind a cheap date. Or I’d just pay. I don’t believe men should be obligated to pay, or even be obligated to organize the dates. If he wants to, I’d appreciate it, and it’s a kind gesture. But I’m usually a generous person who likes to help out, whether it’s splitting the bill or paying it all together. On our last date, we went to Red Robin, Barnes and Noble, and the movies. He paid the bill at Red Robin, but then his debit card was low, so I got him gifts at Barnes and Noble and bought our movie tickets. Simply put, you should love each other, appreciate each other, and have fun, wherever you are!

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  41. Not if he’s a recovering alcoholic! A coffee date could imply that he has respect for you, and doesn’t want to get you sloppy drunk. Or he doesn’t want to invest time and money into you. Coffee dates personally are cold and uninviting. There’s no need to be wined and dined, but a nice bar for a cocktail is a bit more upscale and classy.

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  42. No!
    Coffee dates are best if you want to know about the person. You will get to know the other person, you will not be interrupted by the waiters and you can spend more time together without spending too much!
    I always prefer coffee dates. You can talk a lot, know each other better, spend some quality time with other person without worrying about the bill.
    I don’t want a man to spend a hefty amount for a date. I will happily go on a coffee date.
    Besides all this Coffee is love <3 :D

    Victor Allen’s

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  43. No ! Not at all! I mean How an invitation for a coffee Date can make some guy cheap all of a sudden! It can be a formal meet up or “Let’s-know-each-other” kind of meet ups! I mean how can you u say somebody is cheap if he just invited a girl for a coffee date in public restaurants.

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  44. IT DEPENDS ON THE TIME OF DAY. If you want to meet me in the morning, sometime between 8 and 10.30 am to get me my morning cappuccino and a pastry, I’m all in. Otherwise I’d go do that by myself anyway, or go with my sister and/or with a friend if they are around. 40 min top to sip my hot coffee while reading Quora or chatting with you.
    If you propose a coffee date at any other time of day, when I am not going to go drink it anyway, you are cheap.
    If you want a date from between 11 am and one or two pm, propose lunch. After five propose dinner. Don’t propose anything between 2 and 5, that’s not an eating or drinking or dating time.

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  45. No. But these are the things that make me think he is cheap:
    Inviting me for said coffee and not picking up the tab (um, you invited me on a date? You pay.)
    Saying he will come visit me but “only on the cheapest flight,” which happens to be a month away. Hmmm. Guess I am not all that important to you.
    Listing in his dating profile that he likes to “split everything 50/50, even after marriages.” For me, marriage is not some sort of financial agreement or contract. Yes, prenups have their purpose but for me marriage is about “What’s yours is mine and vice versa.”
    If you want to date, men, (and by date I mean find the love of your life) then don’t be cheap. Put your best foot out there, be positive, be generous (but wise!) and go for it!

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  46. I love coffee! I wouldn’t hesitate to treat a woman to a Latte. It’s not being cheap, it’s just a preference. I’ve never met a woman that refused a Latte or some other tasty coffee related beverage. I’ve had some pretty good times in Starbucks and Bruegger’s Bagels. That is the perspective of a man.

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  47. No, coffee dates are understood to be casual and for the purpose of determining if there is enough interest to move on to more extensive dates.

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  48. I have always received a warm acceptance for a coffee date, especially where we are in the “getting to know you, getting to know all about you”, stage.

    Do women think “coffee dates” mean a man is cheap?

    However, I have been advised by several professional women that if a guy would like to go further, then a higher class, lobster and steak is a good start.
    She seems, to accept, because the idea is good to her. If the guy can keep from screwing up by being an ass (Remember, an ass is in the eye of the beholder), then his dreams may come true or not.
    Personally, I’ve had good and not so good coffee shop and fine dining experiences. At times I have been enamored by, what to me is, an attractive, vibrant and most interesting woman. Then, are the unfathomable times, when the complement is not returned.
    This is why we date, not necessarily for booty. However, to find out the compatibleness of this possible enjoyment and fun in this relationship.
    I like to believe I’m past the stage where impressing or being impressed is of any importance. Now, being able to respect, appreciate, listen and have those manners returned, to me, is the sign of a quality woman.
    She may select who’s to bed her and I will select whom I desire to bed. I like to think it is always more than sex. It’s liking and caring about another human being. Perhaps it is or perhaps not. I am not comfortable until we can pass time together without having to be busy. You know . . . Just chill’n.
    I hear, when we first meet someone, for the very first time, we do not know whether they will be gone in a minute, hang out with us for a few years or be there forever. I like to think, I treat all people as if it’s forever.

    Do women think “coffee dates” mean a man is cheap?

    Have coffee, have lobster or peanut better sandwiches in the park. Just talk, normal, natural and with honesty. A coffee shop date is not cheap its a great opener, maybe the best. It’s gonna always work out.

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  49. As all women are different some women I am sure do and others I am sure don’t.
    My personal view is that coffee dates have their place. They are a good thing to do when you are not really at the stage of knowing a woman well enough to go on a full on date.
    If coffee dates was all a person went on I can see how that would be a turn off though.

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  50. Are you kidding me?!?! Coffee is so damn expensive and overpriced, especially the popular cafes and hipster cafes like Starbucks. You can get much cheaper coffee from coffee shops or better quality coffee for the same price at places where they actually specialize in coffee, not marketing to students.

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  51. I never thought it was cheap. I thought it was a no commitment way of getting introduced to someone. This is especially useful if it is a blind date or someone you really don’t know very well. The last thing I want to do is get into a stranger’s car, have more than one or two drinks, or make a whole day/whole evening time commitment. This gives you an easy out after a reasonable amount of time if things aren’t flowing. If everything is green light on both sides, you can set up a second, better date or extend the evening.

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  52. I dated a guy once—exactly once—who took me to coffee, ordered and paid for himself, and then stepped aside and let me buy my own tea. It wasn’t even a Starbucks or somewhere on the pricier side…he chose a basic grocery store counter.
    Another coffee date was with a French guy. He was a gentleman, bought me a drink, and then talked about himself for an hour. I gave him a second chance, and with it he talked about himself for an hour and a half over dinner and accidentally spit in my food. Twice.
    Third coffee date was with a really nice, nerdy guy I couldn’t imagine being attracted to. He chose a cute cafe, arrived first, and greeted me warmly. I was a little sick, so he got me a big pot of chamomile tea, made sure I had hot water throughout the date, and gave me lots of kindness and attention.
    I had such a good time talking to him, I decided to see him again. And then again. He didn’t spend huge money on me, but he always offered to pay. When I asked to pick up a meal or at least split the bill, he thanked me and consented.
    After the third date, I found myself attracted him, to my surprise. He was a good person and I really enjoyed being with him, but then it came out (after we had slept together, twice) that he was only separated from his wife, not divorced. And he was still deciding whether to go back to her or not. And he didn’t want a relationship.
    Basically, most of my dates have left me shaking my head and wondering what the ever-lovin’ fuckkk. The type of date is irrelevant. Every encounter gives you a chance to show who you really are.

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  53. Personally, I’d think nothing of it. I respect a guy who saves his money for things that really matter or for things we care about more than a meal. If he saves it for a hot air balloon ride, please, let’s not get coffee at all!

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  54. No. I love coffee. I also appreciate that a coffee date can be as long or short as you want. And I don’t expect the man to pay for coffee (or for anything I’m having really) – so I appreciate that it’s cheap!

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  55. No, it’s the first step in a dating relationship. have coffee, chat, learn each others’ likes and views. Dinner and a movie is my idea of a bad first date. Take it slow!

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  56. No and not at all. Infact, a girl can easily understand a guy within few minutes of coffee date. Normally girls don’t easily agree for a coffee date. They take time, understand the person, develop trust, friendship….then finally comes the coffee date. But, a point to be noted here is, guys should be a bit patient too. May be, they could easily understand girls within two or three meets. But for a girl, it takes time. So, a right coffee date at the right moment, I swear, will give you a bright future.
    Yes, a lot can happen over a coffee….

    Peet’s

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